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This brief entry was brought to you by the manufacturers of Xanax.

Let me just say this: When you don't believe in spanking and your oldest kid gets angry and yanks the youngest kid's wrist and the youngest kid has to go the hospital for x-rays and whatever because four hours have passed and she still hasn't used her arm?

Yeah. It's really hard to stay firm on the No Spanking thing.

But I didn't spank.

And for that? I'm feeling a bit proud.

(Because I really fought the urge to spank.)

((And I'm not asking for advice cleverly disguised as Words of Wisdom on the spanking thing. I'd much rather you use that energy to raise your glass high in the air and yell, "Cheers to All Parents and Their Individual Differences!"))

Salud.

Posted by: fluidpudding on 4/22/2008 5:01:00 PM , 36 comments
Submitted by Badger at 4/22/2008 5:45:01 PM
    Okay, well I am here to tell you that my son broke my daughter's collarbone when he was four and she was three, by pushing her off his bed (upon which they had been jumping at the time).

    And we don't spank either. (We don't need to! The kids keep each other in line JUST FINE! HAHA!)

    So I am definitely raising a glass (of Xanax? yes?) in your general direction and whatnot. Slainte!
Submitted by blackbird at 4/22/2008 6:23:07 PM
    And is my liddle puddin head okay?

    I'm taking the Xanax FOR YOU.
Submitted by You can call me, 'Sir' at 4/22/2008 6:32:47 PM
    Your self-control in the face of overwhelming temptation is admirable, indeed. Three cheers for better living through chemistry!
Submitted by amy at 4/22/2008 6:49:13 PM
    hugs
Submitted by Gail at 4/22/2008 6:49:33 PM
    I commend you.

    My(at the time) 3 year old lost one of her front teeth when her 5 year old sister yanked on the belt that she had in her mouth. They were playing "fishing". I did not spank even though my baby regressed to bed wetting for the next 2 years. By the way, they are now 24 and 22 and a beautiful new tooth grew in when she 6.
Submitted by Snippety Gibbet at 4/22/2008 7:12:39 PM
    I love the ending sentence about the fact that you are not secretly asking for advice here. hehehehehe..... I absolutely raise my glass to you for your infinite patience. Here, here!
Submitted by Aurora at 4/22/2008 7:14:59 PM
    Cheers!! To you! And all the diverse parents out there! Salud! Bottoms Up (hee hee!!)! I raise my glass AND tip my hat to you!!
Submitted by Nichole at 4/22/2008 7:26:35 PM
    Well done!
Submitted by Mandee at 4/22/2008 8:24:55 PM
    Cheers!

    My older sister tried to choke me with a peppermint, fed me a poisonous plant, and pushed me off the bed more than once before I was 3 (in all fairness, I once threw a butter knife at her). We are now best friends.
Submitted by shirky at 4/22/2008 8:49:45 PM
    is her arm ok?
Submitted by jen at 4/22/2008 9:03:43 PM
    Salud!

    Hope Harper's arm is better.
Submitted by FP at 4/22/2008 9:08:01 PM
    CHEERS to you all!

    AND, yes. She returned (with Jeff) from the hospital a few hours back, and all is well. It might be a slight sprain--we've been instructed to elevate it and apply ice if it starts to swell.

    As I type this comment, she is sawing logs in her bed with her arm wrapped around her new stuffed dog (named Muno, if you're wondering). No complaints.

    (Thanks for your concern. You guys are the best.)
Submitted by gorillabuns at 4/22/2008 9:48:15 PM
    I truly commend thee!
Submitted by Marcia at 4/22/2008 9:48:39 PM
    Poor Harper! I'm sure that Meredith, even if she doesn't show it, is sad that she really hurt her sister!
Submitted by c at 4/22/2008 9:57:49 PM
    My son has Aspergers so I don't believe spanking works or helps anything because of his condition and I think it would not help even if he was not autistic.
Submitted by Gregg at 4/22/2008 10:46:26 PM
    I'm sorry, but all I can think of when I read this post is....why doesn't that pudding truck come to my house?
Submitted by Carroll at 4/22/2008 11:20:58 PM
    Awesome restraint, Mrs. P! Kudos to you for that, and for so many other small miracles in your apparent parenting. Well done, indeed :-)
Submitted by sarah at 4/22/2008 11:37:49 PM
    I raise my beer (I'm Canadian - beer is better than Xanax). Let us toast each other, as I, too resisted the Overwhelming Urge To Spank a couple of months ago when my older daughter hit my younger daughter on the head (hard) with a flyswatter, "Just in case she had an ant on her head."
Submitted by Meg T. at 4/23/2008 1:44:03 AM
    mmm glass of Xanax, relaxilicious.
    Well done. well done. I'm told it gets easier.
Submitted by Alli at 4/23/2008 7:51:20 AM
    Nostrovia!
Submitted by joaaanna at 4/23/2008 9:02:21 AM
    As Good Ole Erma Bombeck said, "The books tell me not to strike my children in anger. When should I strike them? When they are bowing their heads in prayer in church?"

    Gald to hear she is doing well?
Submitted by joaaanna at 4/23/2008 9:03:33 AM
    That was meant to be:

    Glad to hear she is doing well.

    Period. Not Question Mark. And not Gald.
Submitted by Alyce at 4/23/2008 10:01:03 AM
    Cheers to All Parents and Their Individual Differences!

    Seriously, you did well. Glad to hear everyone is doing fine.
Submitted by Susan at 4/23/2008 10:16:13 AM
    Good for you! Times like those makes me appreciative of having only one child. I'm glad there was nothing seriously wrong with Harper's arm. I think probably taking her to the hospital was punishment enough for Meredith (guilt).
Submitted by Heather at 4/23/2008 11:02:51 AM
    My young (4 year old), very strong son often expresses his anger and frustration by using my eye as his bulls-eye target. It is very hard to keep my spank hand in check, so I'm raising a Salud to you.
Submitted by Amy in StL at 4/23/2008 12:36:06 PM
    Way to stick to your convictions... See, I was going to say guns there, but that just seemed wrong! :)

    And Cheers to you and all the parents out there muddling through your jobs.
Submitted by bec at 4/23/2008 12:41:20 PM
    Cheers to you!! It's amazing what damage such small people can wreak, isn't it?

    In a similar vein to previous commenters my sister and I once threw our other sister down a flight of stairs in a sleeping bag, just to see what would happen. On another occasion they dropped a 4 pound bottle of liquid Comet down the laundry chute onto the bridge of my nose. My parents (thankfully) did not spank, and we've all turned out to be pretty good friends and fairly well adjusted. With a few glasses of wine, and maybe some Xanax, my parents managed to survive too.

    Here's hoping everyone is happily recovering at your house today.
Submitted by Amy in KC at 4/23/2008 1:28:20 PM
    I have to admit that not spanking is much harder than I thought it would be, and the number of times I have had to close my eyes and practice deep breathing have been more than I care to share.

    And sometimes I get thwacked between the eyes with a toy by the offender as I try to tame spanking urge.

    Hats off to FP!
Submitted by Courtney Watson at 4/23/2008 1:56:56 PM
    Having no spawn of my own, I cannot speak from a mother's point-of-view. But, I hope to be a non-spanker when the time comes.

    I just imagine that scene from "Mommie Dearest" when I hear the word "spanking"...

    "NO WIRE HANGERS!!!!!!!!!"

    Hope her arm is OK~
Submitted by MP at 4/23/2008 2:19:58 PM
    There was never spanking in my house..there was the treat of spanking..and guilt. The guilt that mom and dad were disapointed was SO very painful..more so than I swat I believe.
Submitted by sweetney at 4/23/2008 9:12:27 PM
    xanax: the no-spank solution!
Submitted by SwedeLady (Maiken) at 4/24/2008 12:18:04 PM
    Amen!
Submitted by Stephanie at 4/24/2008 4:36:32 PM
    Prost!
Submitted by allison at 4/26/2008 9:45:27 AM
    That is some mighty resistin' power there!
    My brother and I were spanked until we were about 11. Once we got older, the punishment was to do the nightly dishes (or some heinous chore like clean out the chicken coop) for a specified amount of time. Since my mom baked a lot, I often would've been happier with the spanking instead of the slave labor.
    We both turned out fine too. But boy, do I hate doing dishes!
Submitted by Jennifer Myszkowski at 4/26/2008 5:18:32 PM
    I'm not a parent. I'm just an aunt who doesn't believe in spanking (in a family that'll spank a child while they read them passages from the bible). But sometimes my niece does things (seemingly on purpose) that drive me out of my goddamned mind and make me want to launch her into the middle of next week (that's my mother talking). It takes all of my power and strength to be a reasonable human being. I have no idea how parents do it (and, for the sake of humanity, I hope I never do).
Submitted by MariaC at 4/27/2008 4:45:26 AM
    Today 22 was my third child third´s birthday. Even if I feel proud of not spanking my moral is very down at the fact that I know/use no alternative option to discipline the children. I am grateful though that they are very calm and well behaved so far. Having them punished all the time and timed out constantly would be as agressive as hurting them, in my opinion. Did anybody send you wise advice?

    Greetings, MariaC.
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