(22) 5/16/2008 7:29:20 AMSocks and Vaginas! Cha cha cha!

(30) 5/14/2008 2:05:05 PMEliminating My Active Infestation of Parasitic Brainworms: Stomp the Toxic!

(69) 5/11/2008 8:02:18 PMLethal and Young (at Heart)

(29) 5/9/2008 4:07:00 PMThere can never be too many Cookes in the kitchen, Alistair.

(17) 5/8/2008 1:28:19 PMThey're poopy and they're kooky, the Pudding family!

(24) 5/6/2008 9:53:20 AMTonight we'll reach for the stars. We'll rent expensive cars.

(17) 5/2/2008 7:21:48 PMTalc Radio at its Finest.

(30) 5/1/2008 12:55:28 PMThese are the Things that Weigh

(5) 4/30/2008 9:56:38 PMStrangers are friends you haven't met yet, Mrs. Bluesky!

(20) 4/30/2008 10:50:07 AMBrainpan. Bacon. The Butt Thing.

(18) 4/29/2008 6:58:41 AMThe most destructive known hurricanes rate as Category 5 on the Saffir-Simpson scale.

(18) 4/28/2008 8:26:40 AMThree is the atomic number of Lithium, Kurt Cobain!

(29) 4/24/2008 11:40:26 AMFluid Pudding Week at a Glance

(37) 4/22/2008 5:01:00 PMThis brief entry was brought to you by the manufacturers of Xanax.

(20) 4/21/2008 12:38:25 PMFluid Pudding drove to the city and met Bossy!

(10) 4/20/2008 9:44:38 PMTHIS is why I don't have many friends.

(7) 4/18/2008 12:11:14 PMPlease Call Me On It

(6) 4/17/2008 2:52:04 PMMy Thursday, as described by K

(13) 4/16/2008 8:56:31 PMThe DD Letters, The Seventh (and Final) Installment

(21) 4/15/2008 2:47:53 PMApril 15th is National One-Liner Day! (I made that up.)

(4) 4/15/2008 9:50:52 AMThe DD Letters, Installment #6

(8) 4/13/2008 8:17:34 PMDear Sunday Night Visitors,

(5) 4/12/2008 9:19:39 PMThe DD Letters, Installment #5

(10) 4/11/2008 10:11:31 AMDear Esteemed Mayor of Pretendville,

(5) 4/10/2008 10:20:12 AMThe DD Letters, Installment #4

(12) 4/9/2008 9:39:07 AMDear Doug,

(6) 4/10/2008 10:20:51 AMThe DD Letters, Installment #3

(14) 4/7/2008 6:42:15 AMTo Whom it May Concern:

(9) 4/6/2008 4:27:59 PMDear You (and You),

(16) 4/10/2008 10:21:30 AMThe DD Letters, Installment #2

(6) 4/4/2008 8:56:26 AMDear Mocha Momma,

(14) 4/3/2008 10:41:04 AMThe Dear Dave Letters

(16) 4/2/2008 9:20:49 AMDear Fellow Lovers of Bacon and Chocolate,

(4) 4/1/2008 9:16:58 AMDear Socks Without Partners,

(15) 3/31/2008 9:40:32 AMUtterly Odious!

(16) 3/27/2008 12:42:29 PMNow I have to figure out what to do about the squirrels.

(24) 3/25/2008 1:00:13 PMI'm going to sit down and write a long letter to Neil Young, too.

(25) 3/22/2008 7:20:42 AMYou'll be the grandest lady in the Easter parade!

(16) 3/21/2008 8:28:59 PMInked!

(14) 3/19/2008 8:53:39 AMLove in the Time of Influenza

(16) 3/15/2008 4:52:51 PMChildren throwing snowballs instead of throwing heads.

(15) 3/13/2008 11:34:50 AM1 2 3 4--Tell me that you love me more.

(25) 3/10/2008 10:27:53 AMIt IS abnormally long. (My tongue. Not my hair.)

(31) 5/16/2008 7:50:35 PMAnd today I can barely walk.

(18) 3/4/2008 9:37:15 PMThe Glass is Never Half Empty.

(8) 3/3/2008 10:37:18 AMThe Von Pudding Family Singers

(11) 2/29/2008 12:45:03 PMThe Sharks are gonna have their way tonight!

(7) 2/28/2008 9:30:58 AMChipmunks Having Kittens

(20) 2/26/2008 10:35:55 AMMy Butt Will Make You Shudder

(34) 2/21/2008 12:22:47 PMConcededly Trifling!

(38) 2/15/2008 8:07:02 AMLove in the asylum is a beautiful thing.

(13) 2/14/2008 10:16:44 AMMuch better than a chalky conversation heart--an actual conversation! About dying!

(21) 2/13/2008 8:49:42 AMWe celebrate one day early. (For me, Valentine's Day is for stalking and pie.)

(17) 2/11/2008 10:59:03 AMLet Yourself Go!

(17) 2/6/2008 9:00:25 PMThree Notes from a Funeral

(24) 2/5/2008 9:01:13 AMThis is a very exciting day in the Pudding house!

(14) 2/4/2008 10:59:44 AMWait. Is this one better?

(27) 2/2/2008 7:22:46 PMI see the doorway to a thousand churches.

(12) 2/1/2008 5:10:35 PMSlick as a sloven!

(27) 1/31/2008 11:00:22 AMCracklin' Rose, you're a store bought woman. You make me sing like a guitar hummin'!

(27) 1/29/2008 6:38:25 PMLoathing or Something

(17) 1/23/2008 4:59:13 PMThat was Bernie. He's really a character, I tell you.

(31) 1/17/2008 11:03:02 AMI'm polishing my tiara!

(15) 1/14/2008 1:20:00 PMThe First Pudding Family Meeting

(15) 1/12/2008 8:36:35 AMJust another Saturdayo!

(20) 1/11/2008 3:45:18 PMProject Make a Dent

(20) 1/10/2008 12:53:27 PMCan you tell me a word that rhymes with Venus?

(15) 1/7/2008 11:48:31 AMThe Things I Learned About Myself During the January 5th Weekend

(31) 1/3/2008 4:52:31 PMI can always make them smile, from White Castle to the Nile!

(35) 1/3/2008 8:42:01 PMFluid Pudding Best of 2007

(26) 12/21/2007 2:03:13 PMMagical Reindeer Food!

(35) 12/18/2007 5:30:44 PMTipsy Has Earned His Wings

(50) 12/13/2007 9:36:13 AMIs it wrong to be in love with a sweater?

(13) 12/10/2007 10:29:03 AMChristmas Card Photo Shoot for the Young and Fierce

(54) 12/7/2007 5:21:23 PMI am a plate of cold chili cheese fries.

(14) 12/3/2007 8:05:33 PMYou still have a shot at love. Are you interested?

(51) 11/30/2007 10:11:05 PMDay Thirty: Oh, that we could always see such spirit through the year!

(7) 11/29/2007 8:34:49 PMDay Twenty Nine: Is this thing over yet?

(40) 11/28/2007 7:18:46 PMDay Twenty Seven: We all cough for Dummkopf!

(20) 11/28/2007 11:26:21 AMDay Twenty Eight: And Meredith slept like a log.

(12) 11/26/2007 6:50:54 PMDay Twenty Six: Meredith has one of those twenty teeth smiles.

(13) 11/25/2007 6:29:47 PMDay Twenty Five: Headaches and Hanami

(7) 11/24/2007 7:00:49 PMDay Twenty Four: M-I-Z! Z-O-U!

(10) 11/23/2007 6:04:57 PMDay Twenty Three: If my mailman wasn't so hateful, I'd French him.

(14) 11/22/2007 9:08:49 AMDay Twenty Two: This is a story about my toilet. Happy Thanksgiving!

(13) 11/21/2007 2:09:55 PMDay Twenty One: I may be rushing things, but deck the halls again now!

(19) 11/20/2007 8:44:50 AMDay Twenty: The God of a missing elephant would like to eat an Indian head.

(8) 11/19/2007 4:21:46 PMDay Nineteen: I'm dressed up like a librarian.

(16) 11/18/2007 9:27:46 PMDay Eighteen: Can you tell my mind is elsewhere?

(16) 11/17/2007 8:21:42 PMDay Seventeen: Quick! Add this to your Thanksgiving menu!

(19) 11/16/2007 7:34:09 PMDay Sixteen: I've almost achieved Loopy Groupie status!

(62) 11/15/2007 10:39:25 AMDay Fourteen: Your opinion, please.

(13) 11/15/2007 10:22:40 AMDay Fifteen: What was I saying?

(18) 11/13/2007 6:08:02 PMDay Thirteen: Did you know that Sydney is sixteen hours ahead of St. Louis? My new calendar told me!

(39) 11/12/2007 8:48:29 PMDay Twelve: At this rate, I'll be posting nude photos by the end of the month.

(22) 11/11/2007 9:00:56 PMDay Eleven: Care to join me on a trip to the store?

(8) 11/10/2007 7:43:30 PMDay Ten: Shortest Entry Ever, but it counts.

(18) 11/9/2007 9:52:41 AMDay Nine: I almost asked someone to hold my hair. But I didn't want to be a nuisance.

(24) 11/8/2007 9:28:42 AMDay Eight: She scored a 4 in Responding to Sensory Input! (That means I can start spanking, right?)

(27) 11/7/2007 3:07:47 PMDay Seven: You know I'm out when I start doing numbered lists.

(18) 11/6/2007 2:03:03 PMDay Six: After dessert, we fell off of a bridge and I woke with a jerk. And by Jerk I mean Jostle, not Jeff.

(23) 11/5/2007 9:44:13 AMDay Five: Double Entendres for Everyone!

(10) 11/4/2007 5:06:25 PMDay Four: Miyagi Have Hope for You

(24) 11/3/2007 2:15:48 PMDay Three: Saturday Night's All Right for Fighting Renee Zellweger (and Knitting)

(12) 11/2/2007 7:47:28 AMDay Two: Helping Others

(4) 11/1/2007 9:17:52 AMDay One: I'll take that NaBloPoMo entry, and I'll RAISE you THREE!!!

(13) 10/31/2007 1:17:52 PM

(23) 10/30/2007 11:12:49 AMManna Bags? Kickshaw Bags? Bonne Bouche Bags!

(23) 10/25/2007 4:59:01 PMPhlegmatic is a good word for today.

(21) 10/24/2007 6:13:45 PMI call it "Nah-Blah-PO-Muh."

(40) 10/19/2007 1:53:52 PMThe albatross and the whales, they are my brothers.

(21) 10/18/2007 3:51:52 PMImma keep playing these cats out like Atari.

(22) 10/16/2007 4:48:28 PMSometimes I blame my mood on Olestra.

(21) 10/15/2007 12:58:22 PMBurning Down the House

(12) 10/11/2007 5:23:14 PM"That is the horror of life, the terror of art," whispered Kafka.

(21) 10/10/2007 1:29:30 PMEczema and the Fortnight Affaire de Coeur

(31) 10/9/2007 12:53:14 PMMy Pretty Pageant Hand

(24) 10/6/2007 10:22:37 PMHey! Do you want to see a really poor quality video of Jeff and Harper? Well, okay then!

(39) 10/1/2007 4:26:13 PMPerhaps I'll make a podcast out of our family's Thanksgiving dinner! Are you holding onto your hats?!

(25) 9/27/2007 1:42:42 PMFrancis Bacon popularized the scientific method!

(17) 9/25/2007 2:22:43 PMI've always liked the Russians, even if they don't have access to bananas.

(30) 9/24/2007 8:58:51 PMAnd my heart beats so that I can hardly speak!

(29) 9/24/2007 7:39:22 AMAnd they swam and they swam all over the dam.

(15) 9/19/2007 8:30:50 AMI forgot to mention that I smell like apples. Yo ho ho!

(19) 9/18/2007 9:44:49 PMIt's a No Lactation Celebration!

(11) 9/13/2007 2:38:10 PMMeredith thinks he's been eating strawberry preserves. She doesn't understand carnage.

(32) 9/12/2007 5:01:32 PMI rehearsed a pole dance just in case.

(5) 9/10/2007 9:38:38 AMI will shatter my leg next week and wait for more awesome to arrive in the mail.

(42) 9/4/2007 3:27:54 PMI'm as charming as Squeaky Fromme.

(15) 8/29/2007 8:46:38 AMTrumpetist Chris Botti is a gifted instrumentalist. But I went with Bottay.

(24) 8/24/2007 2:47:51 PMEffortlessly Flabbergasting

(23) 8/19/2007 10:04:38 PMLily and the Mother Theresa Conga Line!

(37) 8/18/2007 2:47:04 PMLike a S'more, but without the campfire!

(14) 8/15/2007 2:10:10 PMThe eighth and final rule: If this is your first night at Fight Club, you have to fight.

(11) 8/13/2007 5:42:59 PMYarn Girl Battles Doctor Doom!

(22) 8/10/2007 2:12:27 PMI spent four years prostrate to the higher mind.

(37) 8/6/2007 2:12:54 PMShe makes my head spin around.

(22) 8/3/2007 2:18:42 PMGet Me to a Nunnery! (Of course, I'll settle for Japan!)

(22) 8/1/2007 7:33:34 PMOh, Dear God.

(19) 8/1/2007 3:18:26 PMSparing a Square for Blood on the Wall

(13) 7/29/2007 5:24:08 PMHead over heels, where should I go? Can't stop myself, out of control.

(19) 7/25/2007 2:10:26 PMMy voice is much higher than I thought.

(19) 7/25/2007 2:00:57 PMI'm not completely unlike Cho Chang.

(70) 7/18/2007 2:21:23 PMCrucio to the Spoilers!

(20) 7/17/2007 11:40:57 AMMommy, say, "Am I living in a Sondheim musical?!"

(24) 7/13/2007 2:36:43 PMFour hungry children and a crop in the field.

(17) 7/11/2007 1:25:41 PMTalking to you is like long division.

(14) 7/6/2007 7:07:52 PMRun Run Away, Bosom of Judas.

(19) 7/3/2007 10:08:53 AMTownspeople, Fancification, and The Ground Beneath My Feet

(17) 6/28/2007 10:52:02 AMAll you really need is heart.

(44) 6/25/2007 2:11:46 PMI wish I would have saved my appendix. Or some scabs.

(22) 6/21/2007 9:10:02 PMSharing horizons that are new to us, watching the signs along the way!

(21) 6/19/2007 5:08:44 PMWhat's it gonna be--me or my ham and Swiss?!

(25) 6/18/2007 1:25:32 PMWe can knock nine down and leave one in the hole.

(6) 6/17/2007 7:12:56 AMHappy Father's Day, Edgy Ballerina Boy!

(24) 6/14/2007 2:39:53 PMI'm not getting Pee Ay Eye Dee!

(11) 6/11/2007 1:53:19 PMBenevolent Bug Bites and a Not So Great Movie About Infidelity and Pies and Such!

(38) 6/9/2007 6:42:29 AMIs there a doctor in the house?

(10) 6/6/2007 2:37:31 PMTaco Terror

(8) 6/5/2007 1:24:05 PMConversations in the car on the way to the doughnut dump...

(18) 6/3/2007 3:30:10 PMI am the It girl.

(21) 6/1/2007 2:20:51 PMI could eat you under the table. (With some fava beans and a nice chianti.)

(16) 5/29/2007 1:39:16 PMIn numbers too big to ignore, Helen Reddy!

(8) 5/27/2007 9:41:21 PMSix Unsuccessful Lines I Used to Encourage Jeff to Stay Home from This Weekend's Conference

(8) 5/25/2007 3:10:07 PMWhen the bough breaks, the cradle will fall.

(18) 5/25/2007 2:57:31 PMDon't switch the blade on the girl in shades, oh no!

(36) 5/22/2007 2:30:34 PMTo sleep, perchance to let me watch Comedy Central.

(10) 5/21/2007 6:55:08 AMWe stayed for nearly an hour.

(15) 5/17/2007 2:16:20 PMWe've already packed three soaps. And some underpants.

(21) 5/16/2007 1:27:48 PMI learned an important lesson today.

(27) 5/12/2007 7:06:51 AM37

(7) 5/11/2007 11:54:40 AMThis could be a problem.

(22) 5/9/2007 6:26:57 PMAsymmetry for you and me!

(28) 5/8/2007 9:57:47 PMPsychological Torture for The Unphotogenic Buddy

(17) 5/6/2007 10:03:35 PMMy nickname used to be Tri-Pupil.

(13) 5/5/2007 5:12:45 PMI now inspire a relaxed awareness and a soothing nature.

(9) 5/2/2007 7:00:27 PMWith a Ravel(ry) yell, she cried "More, More, More!"

(11) 5/1/2007 10:16:58 PMMenstruation and the Fortress of Solitude

(16) 4/30/2007 6:53:45 PMIch Liebe Cake

(9) 4/30/2007 8:56:57 AMAnd we can't build our dreams on suspicious minds.

(10) 4/29/2007 7:22:10 AMHappy Birthday, Meredith Claire!

(13) 4/28/2007 7:48:55 AMHappy Birthday, Harper Rose! (And you too, Harper Lee.)

(6) 4/27/2007 3:16:42 PMHang up the faces, Lon Chaney.

(17) 4/26/2007 3:10:04 PMIt will be a piece of cake!!! Get it?!?!?!

(13) 4/25/2007 3:52:12 PMMerely this and nothing more.

(15) 4/25/2007 3:32:03 PMCheck out my breadbasket!

(16) 4/23/2007 8:06:02 PMAll of my cavities have been given the stamp of approval.

(11) 4/20/2007 3:20:23 PMHey, Fluid Pudding! What have you been eating?

(7) 4/19/2007 8:52:11 PMThe Father of 26 Chickens

(21) 4/19/2007 8:19:49 PMIn Case You Were Wondering

(20) 4/17/2007 3:18:56 PMOn this, the day of the Andrew Bird show...

(19) 4/15/2007 8:14:54 PMWe together make a limb.

(36) 4/12/2007 12:36:53 PMFriends are nothing more than strangers that you've met! Right?

(13) 4/9/2007 1:18:01 PMSomewhere in my youth or childhood I must have done something good.

(18) 4/6/2007 3:08:37 PMIt's my brow or the highbrow!

(11) 4/5/2007 2:06:17 PMOh, I could write a sonnet about your Easter bonnet.

(13) 4/3/2007 1:43:28 PM"Hey, Fluid Pudding! What are you knitting?!"

(22) 4/1/2007 8:05:46 PM"We exist in a fabric of personal stories."

(46) 3/30/2007 9:51:10 AMDon't let the smell fool you.

(8) 3/29/2007 10:17:58 PMHaiku Thursday (the first and probably only)

(18) 3/28/2007 10:38:33 AMAnd if my daddy thinks I'm fine...

(15) 3/25/2007 2:28:09 PMDeath and Donuts

(16) 3/23/2007 1:05:43 PMWe all shine on like the moon and the stars and the sun!

(19) 3/20/2007 9:41:33 PMIt's all about what comes out. And Dave Coulier.

(8) 3/20/2007 9:35:51 PMShe'll hold my hair out of my face when I vomit!

(16) 3/19/2007 4:19:48 PMBig Mac Attack!

(20) 3/17/2007 11:51:03 AMWe don't need no condemnation!

(21) 3/16/2007 1:59:55 PMGod's closing doors and opening windows and climbing down the chimney!

(14) 3/8/2007 3:47:59 PMPoop to Shoe!

(37) 3/3/2007 2:32:30 PMI am an international disaster.

(17) 3/2/2007 7:03:42 PMDon't judge me for nursing a toddler, and don't judge me for contemplating the weaning thing. Don't judge me for wanting a burrito.

(5) 3/1/2007 3:43:06 PMConversations with The Rembrandts

(19) 2/27/2007 4:47:17 PMI loved you since I knew you. I wouldn't talk down to you.

(13) 2/24/2007 3:34:06 PMThe Irritable Bowels of Compassion

(28) 2/23/2007 5:18:03 PMYou had no idea this was a top-notch day, did you?

(13) 2/21/2007 6:48:48 PMOn the way home from the parent/teacher conference...

(6) 2/21/2007 12:21:01 PMC is for Conference. And Cookies.

(13) 2/19/2007 1:53:42 PMFits and Starts!!! Aplomb!! Ablow! Scarlett.

(11) 2/17/2007 5:31:17 PMWe just got served. Single served.

(12) 2/13/2007 6:51:57 PMHe says that he's going to marry me. We can raise a little family.

(13) 2/11/2007 6:33:13 PMBarack me like a hurricane!

(9) 2/10/2007 6:45:09 PMAnd she cruise to the crews like connect da dots.

(7) 2/9/2007 5:13:15 PMThis, That, and The Other Thing.

(20) 2/6/2007 9:36:08 AMHow The Bitch Stole Christmas

(29) 2/5/2007 10:30:54 AMIn which it becomes clear just how little I have going on over here...

(29) 2/1/2007 9:00:40 PMThe Pound. Squared.

(17) 1/29/2007 9:12:42 AMGardening at Night

(25) 1/23/2007 2:15:54 PMJust call me Holy Willie.

(11) 1/22/2007 10:55:32 AMI could hop up a mountain!

(17) 1/20/2007 4:19:01 PMWhat is an egg, and why does it need a retrieval cord?

(3) 1/19/2007 7:27:37 AMDear Bucketheads

(1) 1/18/2007 7:00:30 PMValencia

(13) 1/17/2007 11:41:06 AMLet Me Count the Ways...

(4) 1/16/2007 4:27:16 PMFear Not, Hobo Fans

(13) 1/15/2007 1:18:58 PMSex, Miracles, (Ice Storms), and Relocation!

(11) 1/12/2007 7:16:20 AMJesus, Ink

(7) 1/11/2007 10:40:43 AMWherein I Change My Entire Personality

(25) 1/10/2007 8:52:12 AMThe things We Do For Our Kids!

(5) 1/9/2007 3:39:07 PMIt's Your Lucky Day: I Was Gonna Blog About Belgium

(10) 1/8/2007 10:49:23 AMI also inadvertently stole someone's nametag. Color me Treena.

(11) 1/5/2007 6:29:20 AMOn Behalf Of The Entire Block, Shut Up About Trading Spaces Already, Ron.

(12) 1/4/2007 9:34:15 PMPoof! Poof! Poof! Galloping Goof!

(18) 1/4/2007 3:08:11 PMAll He Wanted Was The Keys to Everything

(13) 1/3/2007 8:33:45 PMWednesday Already?

(18) Monday, January 1, 2007Year In and Year Out

(4) 12/29/2006 8:15:14 AMA Very Bali Christmas

(12) 12/28/2006 3:49:59 PMThe Best Christmas Present EVER!

(12) 12/28/2006 10:31:39 AMLa Paz

(6) 12/26/2006 10:07:00 PMInk Cartridges and Hobo Detectors

(12) 12/25/2006 6:37:09 AMNot just us, but each and every one of you.

(9) 12/24/2006 1:34:34 AMThis is How...

(11) 12/23/2006 8:55:05 AMI've got spirits, yes I do!

(7) 12/22/2006 6:46:00 AMRaaaaaaaaahhhhrrrrrrrngggg

(9) 12/21/2006 10:00:43 AMNew Holiday Traditions

(13) 12/20/2006 12:00:46 PMHow'd You Get Such a Very Big Tree?

(8) 12/20/2006 7:31:21 AMJunk in a box!

(12) 12/18/2006 7:50:28 AMWe now have our own baby Jesus. Thanks, Xavier Roberts!

(21) 12/18/2006 12:14:32 AMPost-Party Report

(9) 12/15/2006 3:16:23 PMI have to do this before I forget.

(11) 12/15/2006 8:01:50 AMThe Long-Overlooked Opportunity Of Literary Product Placement

(7) 12/14/2006 10:12:44 AMA Wonderful Town

(5) 12/12/2006 5:24:48 PMHobo Law #42

(14) Monday, December 11, 2006Grease is the time, is the place, is the motion.

(21) 12/10/2006 10:49:25 AMHot Patootie, Hot Patootie!

(10) 12/10/2006 10:48:52 AMA big welcome to the F word!

(7) 12/8/2006 7:23:25 AM

(8) 12/7/2006 8:38:38 AMSanity: The Best Present of All

(21) 12/6/2006 4:58:53 PMDippedy Do Dah!

(20) 12/5/2006 2:13:01 AMStories About Leather

(11) 12/1/2006 10:02:27 AMFour Poems For The Poor Bastards On Dateline NBC’s “To Catch a Predator”

(4) 11/30/2006 3:23:48 PMnada

(22) 11/30/2006 3:22:56 PMDestiny's Children

(41) 11/29/2006 10:57:53 AMLetters To Louise

(25) 11/28/2006 4:00:31 AMOpen the Windows, There's a Hobo in the House

(33) Monday, November 27, 2006My sweatshirt has bells on it.

(29) 11/18/2006 3:14:57 PMYou've been thinking, and I've been drinking. We both know that it's just not right.