Personified Candy Canes: Erratic or Erotic?

Last night, nine of us journeyed out to a local light display, where we boarded a train and marveled at millions of lights.

PLEASE NOTE: This light display is in St. Louis, Missouri. Although it may share a name with a truly fantastic display across the ocean, I can firmly say that the two events are not related. (I just spent thirty minutes looking at the photos of the other display, and suddenly I want to board a plane and go. Absolutely lovely.)

ONE MORE NOTE: This entry is not intended to disrespect the local display. We loved it, and were merely “in a mood” while riding the train. Our kids are still talking about how much fun they had. We will most definitely be returning.

Most of our journey looked a lot like this:

And this:

And that’s sort of what you expect when you go on a “millions of lights” adventure, right?

However, we also saw a little bit of this:

My 12-year-old Nephew (M12YON): For some reason, that makes me feel a little uncomfortable.

Me: Is it because he looks like he’s been poked in the privates by a big toasted marshmallow skewer?

M12YON: Is this journey Rated R?

We continued to ride.


My Sister: Whoa! Hey there!

Jeff: Someone’s hanging low!

That’s all it took for the seven of us (the girls retained their delightful innocence) to see past the magic (and tune in to our inner Porky’s).

We were now taking a ride on the Lickerish Express.

(Please know that all inappropriatisms (and that is NOT a real word) were kept under our breath. The Puddings are very considerate of others when they spew dirt.)


M12YON: What is that down by his leg?

Me: You know how candy canes roll. As soon as the lights go out, they get all junkie.

M12YON: I don’t like the look on his face.

Meredith: His arm is going the wrong way! Wheeee!

Regardless of (and perhaps because of) the Candy Porn, The Puddings are now fully dipped in the Christmas Spirit.

We’re in. ‘ ‘ ‘text/javascript’>

9 thoughts on “Personified Candy Canes: Erratic or Erotic?”

  1. We haven’t done our drive around to look at the Christmas lights yet. I think when I do I’m going to have a whole different perspective on the sights.

  2. Oh, I am SOOOO glad you posted this. Up to now I was starting to think I dreamed that place. What a relief to know someone else witnessed elf porn!

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