I don’t care who designed Kate’s dress.

Harper will be six tomorrow, and I have a field trip with Meredith’s class (Chinese Buffet!). Meredith will be eight on Friday, and I have a field trip with Harper’s class (Zoo!). We have two birthday parties scheduled for Saturday and one for Sunday. Things are hectic, but it’s a Happy Hectic.

“Oh! Wait a second,” you may say, “I have noticed a glaring omission in your List o’ Hectic! Prince William! Kate Middleton! Have you no desire to put on a hat and participate in the jollification? EVEN ANDERSON COOPER WILL BE THERE!”

Oh, Internet. I will not be dragging myself out of bed to watch the royal wedding (or The Royal Wedding, depending on how much oomph you feel this event deserves). I dragged myself out of bed when I was eleven years old to watch Prince Charles marry Lady Diana, and I do remember it as being sort of perfect as I sat wrapped up in a blanket on the couch next to my mom. But listen. Times have changed. I’ll be 41 in a few weeks, and at this moment I can’t think of many things that excite me so much that I would leave my bed. I’m TIRED!

Okay. The Following Things Would Excite Me So Much That I Would Leave My Bed:
1. A midnight showing of Amélie complete with complimentary sweet potato pancakes and bottomless chai tea lattes. (Click on the link. It will take you to one of my favorite scenes from the movie. It never fails to bring tears to my eyes.)

2. Schmutzie has a pair of new Stefanies she’d like to give me for twenty bucks if I can meet her at a coffee/pancake dump at two in the morning.

3. Mumford and Sons are playing in my back yard, Tina Fey has set up a burrito stand, and Jimmy Fallon is hanging out by the fence with a Pocket Full of H’s!

4. Unexpected movement of the detritus that tends to sit motionless in my intestinal switchbacks.
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14 thoughts on “I don’t care who designed Kate’s dress.”

  1. I thought that I’d be much more excited about the Royal Wedding. Alas, I am not. I am, however, excited about going to see Mumford and Sons this summer.

  2. I am going with my oldest to the zoo for his 5th grade field trip as well. I have friends who worked at the zoo and quickly discovered how school groups became the bane of their existence (but we’ll be super nice).

  3. Amalie is one of my favorites too. One time, our home was broken into and they took a bunch of our DVDs. Amalie was in that bunch. I always found this a bit ironic and hoped that the robbers gleaned good information from that one.

  4. If I could give you a pair of Stephanies, that would mean that I probably also had a pair for me, and that would be very good indeed.

    But I don’t, and that is very sad :(

  5. I’m thinking of watching the royal wedding, but only because my husband gets up at 4 a.m. anyway and ALWAYS wakes me up with his loudness. Plus, I’m not planning to leave my bed. I’ll just wake up, hit the button and watch from the comfort of my blankets and pillows until I have to get up for work. Alas, they don’t find the royal wedding to be a good enough reason to let me off work!

  6. I refuse to discuss the royal wedding on the grounds that it depresses me, because I am morose and pathetic and live in the past, but hey! Happy birthdays to Harpwhizzle and MC!! Also, there is no way Harper can be SIX. I am pretty sure you miscounted somehow. You totally just gave birth to that kid last week! Shenanigans!

  7. I wonder if you could arrange Mumford and Son’s to play during intermission of a screening of Amélie . I’d pick Tina Fey up at the airport on my way over..

  8. I found this through Bloggy Moms, someone posted it as a favorite read this week… I couldn’t agree more! Who cares about the wedding, unless you are invited or are royalty of some type? I have 2 babies to chase, dishes piling up, and when my head hits the pillow, that will be it for me!

  9. Gandhi rhymes with Mardi (from the post the other day)…so I guess in a roundabout way, Gandhi rhymes with Tuesday (in another language).

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