The Neighbor. The Squirrel. The Groundhog.

The cranky guy next door put a Coming Soon sign in front of his house a few weeks back, and last week he filled the side yard with a gaggle of men carrying hammers and drills and lunch boxes. For five days the air was filled with the sound of banging and whirring and damnits and shits and now the house has an opening that wasn’t there before! More Doors = More Opportunities!

Meanwhile, I’ve been watching a squirrel as he carries sticks and leaves from our yard to our pine tree, where I assume he’s building a house. He’s been working very hard, and it feels like all of the back-and-forths would be tiring for a squirrel, so I’ve been helping.


I know putting these leaves in the tree for him screws with the balance between man and beast and will surely lead to him losing all of his squirrel skills and then he’ll start begging for money, but as so many people say: We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it!

As I packed some leaves into the tree this morning, I noticed a hole in the yard. I’m pretty sure the hole is filled with murder hornets because that’s just the sort of year it has been, but just in case it’s vacant I want the word to get out that it would be really nice to have a groundhog as a tenant.

I’ve placed a sign.


So now we wait.

2 thoughts on “The Neighbor. The Squirrel. The Groundhog.”

  1. Home purchases really should come with a disclosed inventory of the neighbors. Grumpy next door could be a deal breaker. We (almost literally) decided to buy our first house when we came out from looking at it & found three cherubic blond/e children lined up along the adjacent yard line. The youngest, then three, stepped forward and sweetly asked “Are you going to be our new neighbors?” Why yes, dear child. Yes, I think we just might be!

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