Things I’ve felt but I’ve never said. You said things that I’ve never said.

This morning the television told me that a jumpsuit must be paired with heels. The models wearing the jumpsuits expressed their fear about jumpsuits, and shortly afterwards I prepared Tamarind Ginger Lentils, although I had no tamarind or ginger. (I was unafraid.) If I EVER purchase a jumpsuit (and I most likely will NOT, although I’m not necessarily spooked by them), I will also not wear the unlikely jumpsuit with heels because heels make my elbows hit the sidewalk. (The lentils didn’t need tamarind or ginger.)

This week has been my favorite summer break week. I’ve managed to spend at least an hour with four of my favorite people, Meredith attended a seven hour birthday party at a friend’s house, and Harper has two days planned with her best friend from the old school. Meredith is enjoying her job at the library, I’ve now finished spinning three different braids of fiber in less than a month, Jeff plays the guitar and makes us laugh every evening, and Harper is creating material for a potential YouTube channel.

That is the 17%.

If I grabbed a fork from the remaining 83%, we would have to discuss the migraine that forced me into bed yesterday afternoon and how I’ve been a huge emotional jar of goo since November. I would also whisper the fact that I haven’t had a decent freelance job in nearly three months and how the girls constantly yelling “Stop!” at each other is going to drive me straight to Mom Loses Her Shit Avenue.

In other words, despite how I tend to sing, we still trudge. And no one can begrudge a trudge, so trudge we do.

When I pull into the garage, I drive until I make eye contact with Einstein. A few inches past eye contact will find me running into the lawn mower.


This afternoon we’ll be having lunch with my mom and my nephew. I’ll be enjoying a baked potato with steamed broccoli and will then eat a bowl of lentils when I get back home. 4:30 will find me yelling questions at Alex Trebek. I’ll be in bed by 10:00, and will try to stay awake by reading until Jimmy Fallon comes on, but I probably won’t make it.

I rarely do.

Carry on.

9 thoughts on “Things I’ve felt but I’ve never said. You said things that I’ve never said.”

  1. I hear and see your trudging, and I applaud your efforts to see the lemonade for the lemons. (I’m pretty sure that’s a mixed clichetaphor.) There are curried lentils and potatoes in my crockpot. I’m going to try to make naan to go with it.

  2. I love Jimmy Fallon, but usually I love sleep more. If there’s a lot of buzz on Facebook about one of his guests, I watch it on Youtube the day after. This is how I got to see he and Anna Kendrick smashing eggs on their heads, and it was pretty darn funny.

  3. Heels? No. Jumpsuits? No. Trudging…sometimes that’s the only and best thing we can do for ourselves.

  4. I’m with Peachy. (I usually am – in spirit, anyway)
    We have that “thing”.

  5. I think that’s why it’s important to write down the non-trudgey parts. So we can look back and go “oh yeah….it wasn’t all blerg”.

    I have two jumpsuits now and people are lucky I wear them with shoes at all.

    Happy Lentil Eating!

  6. I’ve never had a migraine, but my husband and daughter both get them so I have some understanding of how thoroughly they mess you up. Sorry you get them.

    In the group of “other 83%” things, I have to say that adolescent girls are right up there at the top of the list, no matter how fabulous and smart they are. The only thing to get you through it is to realize that one day they will wake up and be completely done with the angst-causing stuff and you’ll wonder what these new creatures have done with your real daughters and life will be considerably calmer.

    Lentils. Baked potatoes. Broccoli. All good.

  7. It is important for the rest of us to know that the bloggers we read are human, too, and have bad days/weeks/months. Thanks for the honesty.

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