Jeff’s birthday was Monday, and although we didn’t get him exactly what he wanted, we did get him a few small useful things. (Like Skittles! And Garfield Minus Garfield!) When he returned home from work on his birthday, the girls sat him on the couch and instructed him to close his eyes and hold out his hands. Obviously, this gave Jeff the opportunity to act all deranged—with his eyes closed and his arms outstretched as far as they would go, he waited until the girls screamed, “No! That’s too big!” before he started swinging his arms around like he was swimming in a pool of monkeys. Because I’m not very graceful when it comes to giving gifts, I danced around and attempted to place an Applebee’s gift card into one of his flailing arms. (Please know that his eyes were still closed and the girls were screaming with delight. Chaos, I tell you.) As I jerked around and placed the card into his left hand, Jeff swung his right arm and punched me square in the jaw. Immediately, my eyes began to water and the scene quickly turned from knee-slapping birthday jollification to remorse for the ghastly accidental pounding.
Me: So. Is this what 39 is going to be like?
Jeff: You KNOW I don’t like APPLEBEE’S!!!
(He didn’t really say that. Jeff recognizes the importance of eating good in the neighborhood.)
Internet, may I ask a favor of you? (I always feel weird doing this, and I try not to do it often.) Two friends of mine have kids who attend the St. Louis Language Immersion School (SLLIS). The school is currently in the running to receive an equipment grant that will go toward building a playground. (I absolutely hate the idea of kids not having a playground.) I will not ask you to donate cash, but would you please consider voting for SLLIS to receive one of these grants? (It’s as easy as clicking a button, and you can vote once each day until March 31.)
I offer you my deepest thanks, along with the promise that this act of kindness will not get you punched in the jaw. ‘ ‘ ‘text/javascript’>
okay – I voted.
Hope the jaw’s okay.
Baby talk baby talk, it’s a wonder you can walk!
(Sorry about the jaw.)
I voted and it looked like they were pretty close to being in first place. Good luck to the kids, kids without a playground is very sad indeed.
So my first thought was that it was nice that St. Louis is not losing it’s native tongue and children will be taught to correctly identify Highway Farty and learn about warshing. Imagine my surprise when I found they teach Spanish and French. Huh.
That Jeff is such a bully. ;-)
I voted!
Buddy Hinton. It took me about three seconds to remember who he was. LOL I tell ya, I could recite the script from most of those episodes.
Will vote. Absolutely.
And Skittles…. what a great gift! <3
I don’t know how I feel that my Captcha to vote was “to threaten.” Maybe it knows I clicked over from your punchin’ story. Also, I had a dream that I obnoxiously dropped by your house and proceeded to be destructive, doing things like spilling all the girls’ tiny tiny paperclips and eating an entire can of fruit cocktail, juice drained out, as if I were drinking it from a cup. You were very gracious.
Oh my god, sorry because that must have hurt but that was hysterically written!
Sadie at heyMamas
I hate it when my husband punches me on his birthday! Voting done.
Hopefully the girls won’t report to their teacher that ‘MOMMY GAVE DADDY A GIFT, THEN DADDY HIT MOMMY!!!’
It’d be like a sitcom, only without the laugh track.
Voting done and will be continued daily. I have a friend in Minnesota who was very involved in the creation of a playground build project. It will be an awesome experience for the whole school community!
I felt your eyes watering, then went and ate some Skittles, since you brought it up.
Voted.